You’re Not Alone

C. S. Lewis once said, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'”

That is why in this blog I will always be addressing you, dear reader, as “friend.” You’re not alone, no matter your struggles, and my prayer and hope is that you might find Living Water (that is, Jesus) in the wilderness wells God has dug into the story of my life.

It’s important you be aware that I am bipolar (rapid cycling, type II), so my posts will likely be unpredictable in output as I frequently have long bouts of deep depression and/or debilitating anxiety, mixed with rapid, extreme mood swings that are like sudden mental car crashes, leaving me with emotional whiplash that can put me out of commission socially for several days until my brain can recover. My illness is particularly severe but I take medication and see a psychiatrist regularly. The Lord is good, and I am grateful for the knowledge and resources available to me in this country and in this time.

Before you read on, know this: I will be brutally honest.

I may even make you uncomfortable. There will be buckets of tears. I’m also hoping for some laughs, preferably most of them out loud. Anything that can take a swing at that melancholy jaw of western Modernity.

The themes will also be unpredictable because I’m an author, musician and songwriter, occasional poet (consider yourself warned), and a painter, so you can expect random posts about my rabbit trails into other creative endeavors aside from dropping my quivering self into the vast unknown of blogging.

Other themes will be my adventures with Campbell, my best friend, blood brother, sarcasm supplier, and husband of sixteen years, who was diagnosed with Chronic Myeloid Leukemia (CML) back in June, 2015. He is an amazing man. We’ve battled together side by side and back to back as we’ve lived and loved and bled and died to ourselves constantly, holding onto Jesus (or rather, He’s held onto us) through tragedy after tragedy. We’ve had our fair share of triumphs as well, though they’ve usually been the bloodied but glorious victories peculiar to walking with Jesus. Campbell’s a pastor with a heart for the marginalized, outcasts, oddballs, and those who struggle with addiction and mental illness. So basically, people like me. We plan on church planting in a year or two and eventually want to go to India as missionaries—something I’ve wanted to do since I was eleven. All in the Lord’s timing. We’ve also waded together into the wild but wonderful seas of parenting. The Lord gave us four amazing, messy, hilarious kids, ages five to twelve. Two girls, two boys, infinite adventures. You’ll read plenty about them too.

Above all, the goal of this blog is love.

A strange and glorious and beautiful and alien love that can come only from God, one that issues from a pure heart, and a good conscience, and a sincere faith. So read on, friend, and discover the redeeming, powerful love of Jesus, knowing that when we fall and fail it is so THAT WE MIGHT be refined, purified, and made spotless, THAT WE MIGHT shine brighter than the stars, THAT WE MIGHT share in His glory because we’ve shared in His suffering, THAT WE MIGHT become more than conquerors in this fallen, broken world.

(All links either lead to informational articles or scripture references.)

24 thoughts on “You’re Not Alone

    1. Thank you, Monica…I am praying I can stay faithful with posting. That’s not my strong suit. I get easily discouraged, so I will certainly be re-reading your comment when I’m battling that self-defeating nature and need some encouragement.

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  1. Wow, thank you Mandy for your courage in sharing your experiences. I am a true believer that God gives only as much as we can handle, He knows you well Mandy…you’re a very strong woman. Your life and how you have overcome will help people understand that they too are so loved by God and He has also trusted them to carry the load to help others overcome. Thank you for sharing.

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  2. Selfishly excited about this. I’ve been a fan and am grateful for your decision to “walk in the light” and pull this out of the darkness that most of us try to hide our considered imperfections. Rock on loudly here. Your voice is welcomed to the party.

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    1. Livey, you are such a blessing to me. I love and adore you, precious sister. Thank you for the encouragement, I know these comments will be needed later when it’s hard to keep going. 💙

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  3. You have me wanting to be reading more! I’ve always enjoyed reading your posts on FB, so I’m excited that you’ve decided to blog. Love you very much, Mandy. ♥️

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    1. LeAnne, thank you so much for your encouragement and love. I am nervous setting out in this new adventure but God has never failed me, even though I continuously fail Him (whether it’s just in my mind or a reality). I do have a second post up called “That Nagging Fear.” It’s about the fear of failure, something I’ve definitely been battling with starting this blog. Hopefully more posts to come soon. Love you, sweet friend. 💙

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      1. The best thing you can do, is to continue having Him by your side. He’s your leader, your follower & your backbone. I’m right there with you on the fear of failing. I struggle with anxiety (test anxiety, that is) and it’s something I do not know how to overcome. I’ve taken a certain licensing test 3X and this Saturday, I take it again. Each time, I’ve gotten closer to a passing score. But…it’s that fear that really takes over. I try not to question or not if He’s mad at me or if He’s punishing me but it does cross my mind.
        I just have to pray that I pass this time that way I feel like I’ve accomplished something. It’s a battle. But, I’m trying to stay positive & not think about the test. I’m just going to go in there and give it my best.

        I can’t wait to read “That nagging fear.” I know I will enjoy it.
        Love you lovely!!! 💙💙💙

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      2. Praying for your exam! Put it in the perspective of your life. When you are old and gray it won’t matter so much whether you passed it or not. This test says nothing about your value or worth, and it is not a sign of how hard you’ve worked. People who are brilliant don’t work at all and yet they get perfect scores. Is there any worth in that? To just show up and get a trophy? You, on the other hand, have worked hard. You’re more than a grade, dear friend! 💙

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  4. Thank you so much!! Reading that makes me feel better. I’ve studied and retained as much as I can. So, I’m just going to go in there this morning & give it my best! Love you so much Mandy!! ♥️♥️♥️

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